Compiled by Ahsan
The biggest problem that people face in life is they get an education in school that teaches them the rules of grammar and geometry laws, which they may never use. Unfortunately, they don't learn the most crucial subject. And that is how to handle your mental state so you can have a higher quality of life.
What do you do when life throws you a curveball? How do you mentally adjust to adversity, move on and not become crushed by life? What kind of adjustments do you make when life hands you a dirty deal?
The following is a synopsis of ten points that will help a person live with themselves and avoid major mental issues. The author is Dr. Murray Banks, who was a psychiatrist that was from New York. He passed away in 2008 at the age of 92. He was as brilliant as he was funny.
Dr. Banks referred to his ideas of mental therapy as mental hygiene. I listened to the recording and tried to capture his ten points. I hope you will benefit from it and share it far and wide. Please.
Ten Points of Mental Hygiene So You Can Live With Yourself
by Dr. Murray Banks
Are you happy? Happiness is a by-product. It's the result of effective life adjustments! It's not a destination you arrive at; it's a manner of travelling.
Do you have a zest for living? Regardless of age, are you interested in love, play and learning more? There are people 80 and 90 years of age who are getting younger every day and 18 who age every minute.
Are you socially adjusted? Do you like being with others? Sharing with others? The most telling symptom is the loss of interest. A well-adjusted person enjoys being around others.
Do you have unity and balance? If you are going to do something, you should enjoy it; that's unity. Don't wrap your life around one thing; that is about balance. Do you realize what you are doing when you identify too much with any one person or thing? You're building your whole personality on one support. If you ever lose that one person or thing, your life will be ruined?
Can you live with each problem you get in life as it arises? Don't look at regrets of the past or worries of what might happen in the future.
Do you have insight into your own conduct? You know the main underlying reasons for what you do? A psychiatrist can never fix you. All they can do is help you to help yourself. If you won't do that, you are doomed. A broken finger will heal itself without your cooperation, but not a broken personality. A nervous stomach will get cured once you understand that you have a fear and you attack that fear, not a moment before.
Do you have a confidential relationship with some other person? Every human being needs someone whom he can talk to so honestly, so freely without fear of being double-crossed.
Do you have a sense for the ridiculous? Do you have the sense of humour to laugh hard and long at what the world does to you? Can you laugh at yourself? Laughter is the sunshine of the soul. If you forget how to laugh, you are dead. Here's the hint of living longer⎯ laugh because when you laugh, you can't get angry or get ulcers.
Are you engaged in satisfying work? You won't break down if you run around too much. You break down from over worry. If you work all day at something you love, you'll be tired even with tension and tears, but you won't break down. Just adjust yourself.
Do you know how to worry effectively? There's only one thing to do if you are worried. Do something active about the cause of your worry. If you are worried about your health, go see a doctor. You have an emotional problem, go to a psychiatrist.
Here is one of many jokes Dr. Banks tells in the presentation:
A patient calls me on the phone and says, "is this the crazy Doctor? I said, yes. Well, I want to make an appointment to see you, how much do you charge? I said $20. The patient replied, well, I'm not that crazy."
The only difference between a happy person and a broken soul is never the problems; the problems are just about the same for all of us. It's the attitude towards the problems that makes us what we are.
It's like the story of the mother who takes her twin boys to see the Psychiatrist. She says one is an optimist and the other is a pessimist. Can you do something to level them out a bit? The Doctor said to put the pessimist son in a room with a large box of new toys and the optimist in a room with a large box of manure. So the mother does and comes back to report the results. What happened? Asked the Doctor? Well, the pessimist son complained about all the boring toys while the optimist son kept digging through the box and said, "you can't fool me; with all this manure, there has to be a pony somewhere!"
Dr. Banks concludes his talk by saying we are all going through life trying to climb a slippery hill. The difference between how you end up is, are you going to get up after you face a worry, frustration or disappointment and try to climb a little higher or are you going to stay lying down and have a nervous breakdown?
Happiness is like chasing a butterfly. If you try to catch it, it will just elude you. However, if you sit down, it will land softly on your shoulder.
Ladies and gentlemen, I thank you!
Listen to the recording if you are a keener:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCvZufTc9G8
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